Well alas it is now September. Where has the summer gone? The same place as they all eventually do, it marched slowly from the future to the present and finally into the past. Now we come to the blessedly cool(hopefully) autumn. My favorite time of the year.
I mentioned farming as an important skill to have when comes the 'pocalypse. I still feel this way, and I don't recall if I mentioned it, but we decided to try an indoor garden to see if we, a pair of college educated adults who have been around gardens much of our lives, could make anything grow indoors. Call it a precursor for some dreams I have for my eventual post apocalyptic survival compound.
We had one large south-facing window in our second story apartment in which to drop pots in front of and hopefully soak up the solar light, water and heat and transform that through magic into edible food stuffs. I think I covered the basics in my last post, but here it is again. We bought several cubic feet of potting soil, filled some five gallon buckets that had originally come filled with cat litter, and then planted several varieties of plants in said buckets.
Our plant list was as such.
1 grape tomato plant (From planter)
1 planter of snap peas on a vine (from seeds)
1 planter of green beans bush variety(from seeds - meant to plant the vine variety – oops)
1 planter of several varieties of lettuce (from planter)
1 planter of green (red) peppers (from planter)
and the herb garden with Rosemary, thyme, basil, oregano and dill. (seeds and planter)
1 indoor miniature perpetual strawberry plant
Now here's the update on our haul. Of the listed plants only the lettuce, pepper, basil and oregeno are still flourishing. The lettuce is fading fast – while the peppers have just begun to flower. I have high hopes for the peppers.
My first problem was the transfer from the original pots to their final homes in the planters. I would guess that I was not nearly as nimble as is necessary to keep the sprouts in top shape.
The strawberry plant was the first to go. We left for a weekend and when we returned it was covered with a web that was formed by a colony of small white insects. No clue what they are, and my quick google search has failed to provide clues.
I over-watered the green beans and snap peas both became moldy and water-logged, killing them in the process. Nothing came of the snap peas, as they just never matured enough. The green beans produced five. Not pounds. Five beans. Rather a disappointment.
The tomato plant exploded until it was around 7 or 8 feet tall. We had wrapped it in a cage early on, but this didn't help much as it collapsed under it's own weight. Afterwards it really largely stopped production. I think that the plant needs to be outside among other tomatoes so that it can pollinate and be pollinated in a giant plant orgy. We got 4 tomatoes out of it. Mind you, these are grape tomatoes. I don't know how they tasted as I detest raw tomatoes.
What I have learned about the herb garden. First Rosemary is a real bitch to get going. Found that little tidbit out later on. When growing rosemary it is best to get a plant that has already been started than trying to raise your own from seed. I planted an entire packet of seeds(100 perhaps) and have nothing to show for it. The rest of the herbs sprouted easily and shot up like weeds, while I got two or three sprouts of rosemary, none of which got more than an inch or two tall.
The oregeno and basil did smashingly well. But they need more room and crowded out the thyme, which had a strong start but died in the end due to a lack of sunlight. On retrospect I might have been able to nurse it back to health, assuming that it is as hardy as common lawn grass. The dill dried out and faded away.
All in all, the plants need more room and better drainage(or someone with a less itchy trigger finger on the watering can). More light would help too. The single window was crowded, especially when that damned tomato plant took off.
This has been an interesting experience, and judging by the amount of food produced, a largely failed experiment. But one valuable for future reference should the inclination take us to plant again in the spring. This was a rather lost cause in terms of payout. Hopefully it works better with more open land. For now, I am set aback by the fact that I am a rather shitty farmer and I dread the day the apocalypse comes. Though I did manage to make it through my experience without losing any digits.
I just started reading My Empire of Dirt by Manny Howard. So far so good. And it provides a fun story that is far more in depth and ambitious than my own - mostly due to my lack of resources. Good to see that I'm not alone in my crazy flights of fancy.
Showing posts with label gardening. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gardening. Show all posts
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Herblore. No, this isn't about pot. Well, maybe.
Herb Lore
The various ecosystems of the planet Earth are ripe with plant life. According to Wikipedia, depending when you visit the site, there are somewhere between 7 and 3,100,042,069 species within the Kingdom Plantae. At least one of which (and seemingly the most important) is Marijuana. The same article informs me that neither Hot Pockets nor money grow on trees. Further research even implies that Hot Pockets aren't even organic. But that can wait for another day.
Plants. Great. Boring. Plants take energy directly from the sun, and turn it into chemical energy that can be processed by the rest of the living organisms on the planet. We, of the Animalia Kingdom survive as parasites on these plants. Both directly and indirectly. As omnivores not only consume plants and their products for nutrition, but we also consumer herbivores. A meal of a hamburger and fries usually consists of beef(or a patty described as meat), which originally came from a living animal that was raised on plants. If it is beef, then the cows were fed on grass, and in this modern age fattened up on Maize(corn). The buns are probably wheat based. The fries are usually some form of potatoes, and the cooking oil that the fries are cooked in is usually squeezed from 'vegetables'. This isn't even to touch on the condiments and other toppings, as well as the paper which the meal was wrapped and delivered.
The fuel that powered the vehicle to get you to Burger King comes from fossil fuels that were plants/animals tens of millions of years ago. The wood that forms the table? And so forth all the way down the line. Then there all the plants that can be used in remedies, to lower fever and calm upset stomaches. We use them for everything. Plants are King.
How many people do you know who can tell a potato from a carrot when it's still in the ground? For you of the 420 variety, Cannabis from Hemp. And the rest of us, Poison Ivy from just about every other tiny ground-cover weed on the floor of the forest.
Human beings started out as nomadic hunters and gathers. Mostly we survived on meat, but we used various plants to supplement our diets and provide some of the other vitamins and nutrients that we need to survive and be healthy. They also knew which to avoid completely as being unbenefical or dangerous. The last two categories make up the vast majority of plant life on the planet. Eating leaves from a birch tree will do nothing for us. The pits and leaves from Peach and cherry trees? They contain Cyanide. Really. Some of the tastiest fruit contain a tint of poison.
Farming aside, it is probable that some sort of worldwide disaster will require at least a bit of scavenging in order to assure survival. And after we've spent centuries to bend our food-crops to our wills, we've weakened them to the point that they need us in order to survive and propagate. In many cases, I've heard, some of those plants don't even form seeds. Most of our current crops, due to our farming techniques, require constant attention and application of chemicals. When we stop tending them, the crops are going to collapse.
Now, that's assuming that a crop collapse isn't what brought around the apocalypse in the first place. We've grown into a culture of Monoculture. That is, a single variety of plants are widely used. And only that variety. Most are clones of one common plant, as is extremely popular in fruit trees. This is good in the fact that it has expanded our food production vastly as we've honed in on the most successful and productive varieties of plants.
Potatoes are an example of this. The Inca people developed scores of varieties of the potato. They were bred to grow on different parts of the mountain, and to resist different diseases. Then, you have the other half of the spectrum. Ireland in the early 1800s. They lived mostly on potatoes, to the point that it has become a stereotype. Potatoes are easy to grow, and they provide excellent nutritional energy. Then, the potato blight hit. Ireland lost a quarter of its population to either starvation or migration.
But this has all gotten off topic slightly. The point being, that we can't really rely on field crops for sustenance during and after a collapse. Which doesn't get around the fact that, to remain healthy, we need the elements which these plants provide us. And unless you plan to take up farming, you're going to need to find another way to get these supplements into your diet. Unless the entire plant kingdom is burned away, then there's a lot of learning to do before hand. As one miss-step can be perilous.
Now, there's the subdivision of the topic/skill set here. Herb Lore. Great that you can identify the plants. But you also need a grasp on what their qualities are. What part of the common dandelion is edible? All of it. What plants might help relieve a headache? And if the need arises and you find yourself in a bad way amongst some worse villains, what can be used as a poison? Trial and error will teach you what you need to know with time. Assuming that you have time, or don't make the wrong trial. Nothing though beats experience. Not even a encyclopedia with bright and glossy photographs and a couple paragraphs of information.
Is that cannabis you're smoking, hemp or oregano? Or maybe you picked out some poison ivy. Dumb-assed stoner.
Oh. Unless you know for absolute certain, stay away from mushrooms. They're not technically part of the plant kingdom, but some of them are edible(and some people thing delicious). The problem is, many are deadly poisonous. And it's tough to tell which is which at times, especially with the varieties that closely resemble one another.
The various ecosystems of the planet Earth are ripe with plant life. According to Wikipedia, depending when you visit the site, there are somewhere between 7 and 3,100,042,069 species within the Kingdom Plantae. At least one of which (and seemingly the most important) is Marijuana. The same article informs me that neither Hot Pockets nor money grow on trees. Further research even implies that Hot Pockets aren't even organic. But that can wait for another day.
Plants. Great. Boring. Plants take energy directly from the sun, and turn it into chemical energy that can be processed by the rest of the living organisms on the planet. We, of the Animalia Kingdom survive as parasites on these plants. Both directly and indirectly. As omnivores not only consume plants and their products for nutrition, but we also consumer herbivores. A meal of a hamburger and fries usually consists of beef(or a patty described as meat), which originally came from a living animal that was raised on plants. If it is beef, then the cows were fed on grass, and in this modern age fattened up on Maize(corn). The buns are probably wheat based. The fries are usually some form of potatoes, and the cooking oil that the fries are cooked in is usually squeezed from 'vegetables'. This isn't even to touch on the condiments and other toppings, as well as the paper which the meal was wrapped and delivered.
The fuel that powered the vehicle to get you to Burger King comes from fossil fuels that were plants/animals tens of millions of years ago. The wood that forms the table? And so forth all the way down the line. Then there all the plants that can be used in remedies, to lower fever and calm upset stomaches. We use them for everything. Plants are King.
How many people do you know who can tell a potato from a carrot when it's still in the ground? For you of the 420 variety, Cannabis from Hemp. And the rest of us, Poison Ivy from just about every other tiny ground-cover weed on the floor of the forest.
Human beings started out as nomadic hunters and gathers. Mostly we survived on meat, but we used various plants to supplement our diets and provide some of the other vitamins and nutrients that we need to survive and be healthy. They also knew which to avoid completely as being unbenefical or dangerous. The last two categories make up the vast majority of plant life on the planet. Eating leaves from a birch tree will do nothing for us. The pits and leaves from Peach and cherry trees? They contain Cyanide. Really. Some of the tastiest fruit contain a tint of poison.
Farming aside, it is probable that some sort of worldwide disaster will require at least a bit of scavenging in order to assure survival. And after we've spent centuries to bend our food-crops to our wills, we've weakened them to the point that they need us in order to survive and propagate. In many cases, I've heard, some of those plants don't even form seeds. Most of our current crops, due to our farming techniques, require constant attention and application of chemicals. When we stop tending them, the crops are going to collapse.
Now, that's assuming that a crop collapse isn't what brought around the apocalypse in the first place. We've grown into a culture of Monoculture. That is, a single variety of plants are widely used. And only that variety. Most are clones of one common plant, as is extremely popular in fruit trees. This is good in the fact that it has expanded our food production vastly as we've honed in on the most successful and productive varieties of plants.
Potatoes are an example of this. The Inca people developed scores of varieties of the potato. They were bred to grow on different parts of the mountain, and to resist different diseases. Then, you have the other half of the spectrum. Ireland in the early 1800s. They lived mostly on potatoes, to the point that it has become a stereotype. Potatoes are easy to grow, and they provide excellent nutritional energy. Then, the potato blight hit. Ireland lost a quarter of its population to either starvation or migration.
But this has all gotten off topic slightly. The point being, that we can't really rely on field crops for sustenance during and after a collapse. Which doesn't get around the fact that, to remain healthy, we need the elements which these plants provide us. And unless you plan to take up farming, you're going to need to find another way to get these supplements into your diet. Unless the entire plant kingdom is burned away, then there's a lot of learning to do before hand. As one miss-step can be perilous.
Now, there's the subdivision of the topic/skill set here. Herb Lore. Great that you can identify the plants. But you also need a grasp on what their qualities are. What part of the common dandelion is edible? All of it. What plants might help relieve a headache? And if the need arises and you find yourself in a bad way amongst some worse villains, what can be used as a poison? Trial and error will teach you what you need to know with time. Assuming that you have time, or don't make the wrong trial. Nothing though beats experience. Not even a encyclopedia with bright and glossy photographs and a couple paragraphs of information.
Is that cannabis you're smoking, hemp or oregano? Or maybe you picked out some poison ivy. Dumb-assed stoner.
Oh. Unless you know for absolute certain, stay away from mushrooms. They're not technically part of the plant kingdom, but some of them are edible(and some people thing delicious). The problem is, many are deadly poisonous. And it's tough to tell which is which at times, especially with the varieties that closely resemble one another.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Soil + Seed + Water = Food. A simple equation.
Most living creatures that I've encountered, Human beings included, are open systems. We need energy to survive, but we don't manufacture that energy our own selves. We take an outside fuel source and chemically convert it into energy. Plants for instance feed off of the sun's energy. The rest of us are parasites on the plants, or parasites on the parasites. Comforting thought isn't it.
More so with the additional realization that in many climates the fall's harvest will have to hold the farmer and everyone who relies on them until the next fall harvest (Though I believe that there are many crops that can be planted for harvest in early summer.)
One of the limiting factors that haunts every species on the planet is food. There are fewer carnivores than herbivores, as the former feed on the latter. Herbivores in turn are exponentially outnumbered by the plants that they feed on. And parasitic vines that feed on mammals that get to close to the sacred pyramid? Well they just suck - back to the point at hand though. We're all limited by how much food we can collect for ourselves and our offspring. Unless we result to cannibalism, and who hasn't thought about eating a baby from time to time. So succulent.... I bet with a nice marinade made of garlic, Worcestershire sauce and a good wine would do wonders for the little buggers.
Back in the days of yore. Well before yesterday. Hell, even before last Monday! Way back when, at the dawn of our species, we survived as hunter-gatherers. Meaning that we killed animals and picked berries for food. In essence, whatever we found we kept. That's great when the world was young and you couldn't throw a stone without killing a moose or six, and every second step saw you tripping over a bush laden with juicy berries. Those were the days. But we're not a bright species, and we have a tendency to over-do things and shit where we eat. So, we ate all the moose and picked those bushes clean and then starved to death. Great for nature – as it kept us from overwhelming the surface of the earth. Briefly.
Then some genius had the brilliant idea that they wouldn't eat all the seeds that they had collected. Instead they would put some in the ground and let them grow. Reap the harvest, rinse and repeat. Pretty damn simple. They began a cycle that we've been following ever since, though the number of farmers have dropped dramatically in the last decades, even from what they were a mere century ago.
As the years passed farmers honed their skills, and improved the plants they farmed by selective breeding. Basic genetic engineering, we've been doing it for years.
In one of the high schools I attended back in the day, they offered Agriculture classes. Four years worth – as the town was surrounded by farms and the school system was full of farm kids. Four years of Ag. That they have four years worth of information to instill should tell you something right there. That's not to mention the four year degrees that are offered in some rural colleges. From the different types of soil and fertilizers for the maximum output, to diseases and other pests that will lessen your harvest, there are a lot of factors that go into making growing food successful. Better get some practice gardening.
A lot of the ground work has been laid here. There's a lot of knowledge to be had. Wish I would have taken one or two of the classes, but I didn't expect to ever need farming. What a fool I am. We've gotten well beyond 'put seeds in dirt – wait – eat'. Wtf? I want a three step process to growing food! Where I just plant a couple of those frozen burrito trees and come back and pick them when they're right and pop em into the microwave.
For those of you that count Bacon as a vegetable keep in mind that we humans are omnivores, capable of eating both plants and animals. Sure, broccoli might not be as appealing as a hamburger, but that's why God bestowed upon us the gift of Cheese, to impart savor unto all the unappealing greens that grow on the earth. Cheese rules. You ever had one of those Chicago Style Stuffed pizzas? They have like an inch of cheese, with the various toppings layered underneath, with the sauce on top. Think that sounds upside down? Well eff you blasphemer!
But it takes a few steps in the skill-tree before you're allowed to take 'cheese making'. First you need to master basic farming, followed by animal husbandry. With a few ranks in dairy mastery to boot. But, all that work is worth it when you get your first wheel of cheddar. Hell, I forgot about the sauce! We're gonna need to put in a few rows of tomato plants.
What am I still doing here? I'm need to go get me some cows, for when the apocalypse finally arrives, I don't want to give up the pizza goodness.
This'll be a cake walk. Especially after I get the cake vines producing.
Zombie Uprising – Nothing has changed, you still need food to survive. Unless you're a zombie. Then all you're going to want to do is eat brains, and that's more of a hunter-gathering activity than it is farming. Unless you're one of those mutated smart zombies, and you breed humans and keep them in pens. You damned dirty zombies. Enslaving the warm-blooded folks like cattle! Don't worry my people! The resistance will save you! Unless the super intelligent mutant zombies figure us out and sneak a mole into our ranks... ZOMBIES!!!!!! DAMN YOU! 5/5.
Global Warming - A planet covered in oceans. Prime farm land is gonna be hella-scarce. Unless your ride is an aircraft carrier, planting surface crops won't be too helpful. Which is bad, because we need those delightful vitamins that plants so easily provide, to do things like prevent our teeth from falling out. Sad day. Better learn to love sushi, because I think that seaweed and salmon farms are about to explode. I hate fish. 3/5
Alien Invasion – Well, we are going to need food. I think that's been established so far. Food provides us with the strength to fight. ET isn't going to give us a food pantry, unless they're doing one of those 'fattening us up so that they can eat us' sort of deals. At which point I see anorexia coming into fashion amongst the freedom fighters of the world. Good thing potatoes are easy to grow and rugged as hell. Did you know that you can grow potatoes in garbage bins filled with sawdust? They aren't exactly difficult to cultivate. Makes you wonder what the hell the Irish were doing... 5/5
Nuclear Apocalypse – Mutations can be good things. Assuming that the fallout doesn't give rise to an army of intelligent plants intent on getting revenge on the monkeys who burned th earth. And for the grievous insult that is Ranch Salad Dressing. We've dug our own hole with a ranch bottle. But, sooner or later our stores of canned food will begin to wear thin. When we're down to Spaghetti-Os and Dogfood, you can keep the Spaghetti-Os. That stuff is shit in a can. With a little luck, those plant mutations will be beneficial rather than aggressive and vengeful, and we can leave the stock of Spaghetti-Os for a real emergency. Like one of those feed the followers poison for a grand mass suicide that typical cult leaders love. 5/5
Resource Wars – Man, the Amish are going to be rolling over in their fields laughing at us. Ja, where are your fancy cars now technology lovers? For they alone held onto the old ways of doing things, leaving them in damn good shape to take over the world when we run out of oil. Fear the Amish War Cow of future years. Now the state of Iowa alone grows enough corn to feed the entire United States. Just Iowa. The rest of our corn goes to fattening cattle and making carbonated sugared water. I have two words for you: Bio-fuel. Wait, is that two words? Or is it just one? How does the hyphen factor in? Frak. Who cares? In the future, our cars will smell like a Fast Food Joint, and it will be marvelous.
Ok, all the above scores, fairly irrelevant. The face of it is, we need food to continue living. Hunting and gathering will only take us so far and without some cultivation going on, we're doomed as a species. So take interest and plant your victory garden today and do your part to stomp the Hun/Vorlons/Lord Humungous/Pirates/Retail Workers. Buy Pocalypse Bonds today!
Me? I'm gonna try to find a copy of Farming for Dummies.
More so with the additional realization that in many climates the fall's harvest will have to hold the farmer and everyone who relies on them until the next fall harvest (Though I believe that there are many crops that can be planted for harvest in early summer.)
One of the limiting factors that haunts every species on the planet is food. There are fewer carnivores than herbivores, as the former feed on the latter. Herbivores in turn are exponentially outnumbered by the plants that they feed on. And parasitic vines that feed on mammals that get to close to the sacred pyramid? Well they just suck - back to the point at hand though. We're all limited by how much food we can collect for ourselves and our offspring. Unless we result to cannibalism, and who hasn't thought about eating a baby from time to time. So succulent.... I bet with a nice marinade made of garlic, Worcestershire sauce and a good wine would do wonders for the little buggers.
Back in the days of yore. Well before yesterday. Hell, even before last Monday! Way back when, at the dawn of our species, we survived as hunter-gatherers. Meaning that we killed animals and picked berries for food. In essence, whatever we found we kept. That's great when the world was young and you couldn't throw a stone without killing a moose or six, and every second step saw you tripping over a bush laden with juicy berries. Those were the days. But we're not a bright species, and we have a tendency to over-do things and shit where we eat. So, we ate all the moose and picked those bushes clean and then starved to death. Great for nature – as it kept us from overwhelming the surface of the earth. Briefly.
Then some genius had the brilliant idea that they wouldn't eat all the seeds that they had collected. Instead they would put some in the ground and let them grow. Reap the harvest, rinse and repeat. Pretty damn simple. They began a cycle that we've been following ever since, though the number of farmers have dropped dramatically in the last decades, even from what they were a mere century ago.
As the years passed farmers honed their skills, and improved the plants they farmed by selective breeding. Basic genetic engineering, we've been doing it for years.
In one of the high schools I attended back in the day, they offered Agriculture classes. Four years worth – as the town was surrounded by farms and the school system was full of farm kids. Four years of Ag. That they have four years worth of information to instill should tell you something right there. That's not to mention the four year degrees that are offered in some rural colleges. From the different types of soil and fertilizers for the maximum output, to diseases and other pests that will lessen your harvest, there are a lot of factors that go into making growing food successful. Better get some practice gardening.
A lot of the ground work has been laid here. There's a lot of knowledge to be had. Wish I would have taken one or two of the classes, but I didn't expect to ever need farming. What a fool I am. We've gotten well beyond 'put seeds in dirt – wait – eat'. Wtf? I want a three step process to growing food! Where I just plant a couple of those frozen burrito trees and come back and pick them when they're right and pop em into the microwave.
For those of you that count Bacon as a vegetable keep in mind that we humans are omnivores, capable of eating both plants and animals. Sure, broccoli might not be as appealing as a hamburger, but that's why God bestowed upon us the gift of Cheese, to impart savor unto all the unappealing greens that grow on the earth. Cheese rules. You ever had one of those Chicago Style Stuffed pizzas? They have like an inch of cheese, with the various toppings layered underneath, with the sauce on top. Think that sounds upside down? Well eff you blasphemer!
But it takes a few steps in the skill-tree before you're allowed to take 'cheese making'. First you need to master basic farming, followed by animal husbandry. With a few ranks in dairy mastery to boot. But, all that work is worth it when you get your first wheel of cheddar. Hell, I forgot about the sauce! We're gonna need to put in a few rows of tomato plants.
What am I still doing here? I'm need to go get me some cows, for when the apocalypse finally arrives, I don't want to give up the pizza goodness.
This'll be a cake walk. Especially after I get the cake vines producing.
Zombie Uprising – Nothing has changed, you still need food to survive. Unless you're a zombie. Then all you're going to want to do is eat brains, and that's more of a hunter-gathering activity than it is farming. Unless you're one of those mutated smart zombies, and you breed humans and keep them in pens. You damned dirty zombies. Enslaving the warm-blooded folks like cattle! Don't worry my people! The resistance will save you! Unless the super intelligent mutant zombies figure us out and sneak a mole into our ranks... ZOMBIES!!!!!! DAMN YOU! 5/5.
Global Warming - A planet covered in oceans. Prime farm land is gonna be hella-scarce. Unless your ride is an aircraft carrier, planting surface crops won't be too helpful. Which is bad, because we need those delightful vitamins that plants so easily provide, to do things like prevent our teeth from falling out. Sad day. Better learn to love sushi, because I think that seaweed and salmon farms are about to explode. I hate fish. 3/5
Alien Invasion – Well, we are going to need food. I think that's been established so far. Food provides us with the strength to fight. ET isn't going to give us a food pantry, unless they're doing one of those 'fattening us up so that they can eat us' sort of deals. At which point I see anorexia coming into fashion amongst the freedom fighters of the world. Good thing potatoes are easy to grow and rugged as hell. Did you know that you can grow potatoes in garbage bins filled with sawdust? They aren't exactly difficult to cultivate. Makes you wonder what the hell the Irish were doing... 5/5
Nuclear Apocalypse – Mutations can be good things. Assuming that the fallout doesn't give rise to an army of intelligent plants intent on getting revenge on the monkeys who burned th earth. And for the grievous insult that is Ranch Salad Dressing. We've dug our own hole with a ranch bottle. But, sooner or later our stores of canned food will begin to wear thin. When we're down to Spaghetti-Os and Dogfood, you can keep the Spaghetti-Os. That stuff is shit in a can. With a little luck, those plant mutations will be beneficial rather than aggressive and vengeful, and we can leave the stock of Spaghetti-Os for a real emergency. Like one of those feed the followers poison for a grand mass suicide that typical cult leaders love. 5/5
Resource Wars – Man, the Amish are going to be rolling over in their fields laughing at us. Ja, where are your fancy cars now technology lovers? For they alone held onto the old ways of doing things, leaving them in damn good shape to take over the world when we run out of oil. Fear the Amish War Cow of future years. Now the state of Iowa alone grows enough corn to feed the entire United States. Just Iowa. The rest of our corn goes to fattening cattle and making carbonated sugared water. I have two words for you: Bio-fuel. Wait, is that two words? Or is it just one? How does the hyphen factor in? Frak. Who cares? In the future, our cars will smell like a Fast Food Joint, and it will be marvelous.
Ok, all the above scores, fairly irrelevant. The face of it is, we need food to continue living. Hunting and gathering will only take us so far and without some cultivation going on, we're doomed as a species. So take interest and plant your victory garden today and do your part to stomp the Hun/Vorlons/Lord Humungous/Pirates/Retail Workers. Buy Pocalypse Bonds today!
Me? I'm gonna try to find a copy of Farming for Dummies.
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